A Mountie in Chicago

10:18pm: Prompt #46 Who or what is your worst enemy and why?
Prompt #46 Who or what is your worst enemy and why?

I don't think I have any enemies. I suppose Victoria was my enemy, I would think you could consider Gerard and enemy. Some people might say that the criminals I arrest are my enemies but I don't feel that way about them. I don't see them as my enemies. They are simply...people who have different moral values.

The phrase worst enemy though makes me think of one thing, myself. I am my own worst enemy. I'm the one who locks myself down, who can;t admit his feelings. I hurt myself and I know I'm doing it but I can't help myself. It is who I am. My own worst enemy.

10:17pm: Prompt #45 - a simple question makes you look away...
Prompt #45 - a simple question makes you look away...

Why did I run? Why was I going after the train? Why am still dwelling on an event form so long ago? I suppose it's something that is always with me, will always be with me. I've thought about it many times but I have never been bale to answer the question why.

Just as I cannot answer the question why did my father die? Why was I exiled for doing the right thing?

Why is one word, many questions and I do not know the answer to any of them.

10:16pm: Prompt # 44 What will they say about you after you're gone?
Prompt # 44 What will they say about you after you're gone?

I've wondered about my eulogy, about what people will say to sum up my life. I remember the one given at my father's funeral. I can remember feeling very proud of how Commissioner Underhill spoke of him. If my own eulogy is half what my father's was then I will be proud.

I would hope that people would remember that I did my duty, that I was a good police officer. I hope they would remember me as a good man and that they'd feel able to say that. I am sure that they will say other things about me, talk about my flaws, the things I should have done. They might wonder about some of the actions I did in my life.

I would hope that whatever they say will be positive. I've tried to live as best i can and I hope that people would recognise that. I suppose I just hope that people would remember me, talk about me. If they have something to say then that;s not a bad thing, at least I'd be remembered.

10:15pm: Prompt # 43 Reasons you do the job you do.
Prompt # 43 Reasons you do the job you do.

I became a Mountie because of my father. My father was a great man and a good Mountie, He was a strong example to me growing up. It was a honour to be able to follow in his footsteps. The life he had was something to aspire to.

I am Mountie, the sense of duty and honour, it's been a a way to structure my life. In the job I have like my father before me I am bale to help innocent people. It's, I suppose you could say it;s a vocation for me. It's enabled me to be who I am, it's enabled me to make my father proud. I can't imagine another job. I can;t imagine not being a Mountie. In the job I do I find, I suppose a reason for being here.

10:13pm: Prompt #42 Write something on the theme of betrayal
Prompt #42 Write something on the theme of betrayal

I seem to be very good at betraying the people I love. I betrayed Victoria by dong my duty. I betrayed my duty a second time by not turning her in. That second time I was so desperate to make up for my betrayal that I was blind to her actions. In doing so I allowed her to betray me. Though her action were motivated by a mixture of love and hate mine were motivated by the feeling I betrayed her.

I hadn't learned from my mistakes however. I was going with her and going with her was a betrayal of Ray. I regret that betrayal, perhaps more than I do with Victoria because I knew that was I doing was betraying Ray, leaving him to take the blame. He would have lost his job, his home, everything and it would have been my fault. I would have betrayed Ray in a way that was worse than my betrayal of Victoria because ray had done nothing wrong.

Since then I have tried to make it up to Ray. I will carry the guilt of what I did every day for the rest of my life. He's forgiven me, he loves me and I am grateful. I will never betray Ray again. I carry too much guilt for that.

10:13pm: Prompt #41 Tell about one of the happiest moments in your life
Prompt #41 Tell about one of the happiest moments in your life

There have been various happy moments in my life. I can remember as a child, with my mother, there were many happy moments. Since I became an adult however there seemed to be less of them. Of course I've been content, I've been happy, as much as I thought I could be. I've never really thought about being happy as such. Being content as always been enough for me.

Ray would say that I struggle to be happy but he;s not quite correct. I have had happy moments with him. Time we spend together is always happy. Often I don't appreciate how happy until it;s over and I find myself missing Ray's company. It can be simple too. One night in my apartment we shared a pizza and just talked, joked with each other as friends do, I have never had that before. Now though, I know that I can have happy moments and there's nothing wrong with that.

1:37pm: Prompt #40 - Confidence
Prompt #40
My theory is that if you look confident you can pull off anything - even if you have no clue what you're doing.

- Jessica Alba

I know people think that I am a confident person and I suppose I do give that impression but I am not always confident. Standing in front of a man with a gun I may seem confident and calm but in truth, I;m afraid. Fear is a natural part of being human. What matters is that I don't let fear control my actions.

Not letting fear control my actions is how I am bale to maintain a feeling of confidence. If I appear confident it gives people around me strength and helps them conquer their own fears. Although it might seem that I make it appear easy the truth is it's not. There are times when I wish I could show how I really felt, there are timed when I wish I had no fear.

I have some idea of what I am doing. I try to read the people around me, to see what their emotional state is so I can better judge my own reactions to them. If I am able to tailor my own appearance to their emotions it will be easier for them and hopefully lead to a good outcome to difficult situations.

1:29pm: Prompt #39 - Where you've been
Prompt #39
"You don't mind where you are because you know where you've been..." - Carbon Leaf

I try not to think of Chicago as an exile but in truth I suppose that is what it was intended to be. Although it did feel like that at first, over time Chicago has felt like home. That's not to say that I've forgotten Canada. I still thrive on barren rocks and snow as I told my father. I always remember the place I've come from. Sometimes I do long for the wide open spaces, but I have my memories.

It might not seem like much but memories can be powerful things when you are many miles from the pace that you used to call home. I can remember how it feels to walk in the snow, how in the summer you can smell the flowers and the trees. The feeling of being one small part of something larger. It's a profound feeling and one which the urban jungle of Chicago can never match.

Although Chicago is home now. I have things here that I never had at home. I have friends, I have my best friend Ray and his family. I will never forget that I am Canadian, that I am a stranger in Chicago but it is home, perhaps not in the same way as Canada. The Northwest Territories are where I have come from, they have helped shape me into who I am. I can never forget that home and that makes my new one more bearable.

1:22pm: Prompt #38 - Dinner
Prompt #38
Write about your muses favorite food. Describe a complete dinner from their point of view.

My favourite food is actually pemmican but it's hard to find any, real pemmican that is, in Chicago. Dessicated meat doesn't appear to be that popular. Although it is filling, and expands in your stomach when you drink water, Ray wouldn't consider it a full meal. Perhaps he's right, dinner suggests a much more than that.

I've had dinner with Ray's family and it could only be described of as an event. Not that Ray;s family aren't welcoming. They are very welcoming if a little...exuberant. Ray's mother is a wonderful cook and she always encourages me to try her various dishes. I always feel quite full after a meal with Ray's family.

Of course sometimes it can be awkward to try and deal with Francesca's advances over dinner but both Ray and his mother make sure she is not too forward. I find it hard to follow the conversations that go on at the dinner table. I admire Ray's ability to be able to keep track of who is saying what. I speak up now and then but mostly I stay silent. It's enough to just be accepted as part of the family.

Sometimes though I prefer a quiet meal with Ray. He has extensive knowledge of the various eating establishments in Chicago and he puts it to good use. We've eaten at many fine restaurants together, although we have often had to leave Diefenbaker outside. Still it's pleasant to be able to share a meal in a congenial setting.

Sometimes we don't bother to go but stay in, at my apartment. Ray will order a pizza, usually two so Dief doesn't feel left out, and we'll sit down together and eat it. It's more informal than going out but it;s nice. It;s a sign of our friendship sharing a meal like that, even if Ray would prefer to eat out of the box. I feel privileged to have a friend like Ray and eating pizza with him is one of the benefits I have living in Chicago. Ray makes dinner interesting.

11:23pm: Prompt 35 - 24 hours
Prompt 35

For 24 Hours, you're given the chance to step in and take over a company, the presidency, or something else of your choosing. What do you do with that 24 hours?

I don't know what I would take over for 24 hours. I have been left in charge of the consulate for over 48 hours in the absence of Inspector Thatcher. I enjoyed the responsibility, although managing Turnbull is a skill I still haven't really mastered. I haven't really done anything whilst running the consulate. My achievements have been to make sure the routine tasks are completed rather than changing anything about how it's run.

I don't even know what I could accomplish in twenty four hours. I suppose I could rearrange the filing system I've been wanting to reorganise the stationary cupboard. Of course it was in charge I would have to delegate those tasks, possibly to Turnbull and I;m not sure that would be a good diea.

It's not that I don;t think I could cope with the responsibility of being in charge but I don't think I have all the qualities at the moment to take on all that the role requires, at least not so I would do anything different. I know that I can run it without there being any need to change anything but that doesn't seem very exciting. So I'm afraid I wouldn't do much with those twenty four hours.

11:22pm: Prompt 34 - Bullet
Prompt 34

There are people I would take a bullet for and people I would like to put a bullet in.

I have a bullet in my back. I don't think most people notice. It doesn't affect my physical activities. The chances are it can never be removed, it will be a permanent reminder of a mistake I made. I took a bullet in my back. At the time I thought I was taking the bullet for a woman but in truth I wasn't.

I was taking a bullet for myself. I knew that Ray was going to shoot, well I didn't know but I suspected. I heard him shout that the woman was armed and logically the only thing for him to do would be to shoot. I suppose you could say that because I knew he was going to shoot that would be a reason to get between the woman and the bullet but it wasn't her I was thinking of.

I was thinking of myself. I was thinking about the way in which I was betraying Ray. I can;t remember a lot about my emotional state at that time but I was aware of that. At the time perhaps I did think I was taking the bullet for her but I wasn't. I took it for myself. I took it for Ray, for us. The bullet belongs to myself and Ray, it's a reminder of what we went through, how much we nearly lost. I would take a bullet for Ray but I will never take another bullet for her.

10:51pm: Prompt 33 - What Doesn't Kill Me....
Prompt 33

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". Do you agree with this statement? Why or why not?

What doesn't kill me makes me stronger? I would think that that's true, at least about some things. In the Territories there are so many natural dangers that a wrong step on a glacier can kill you. But if you survive the experience you learn form it. You step more carefully next time. The Inuit know about how the elements can affect their lives and they learn from their experiences.

I think I learn from my experiences. Although Ray would say the number of times I've risked our lives I probably haven't. Police work is inherently dangerous but by surviving the various experiences we have makes us better able to enforce the law.

So I do agree with that statement. The risk is worth it, the risk of doing my duty or simply trying to survive ultimately helps to make me more knowledgeable and therefore better able to deal with my experiences. It might now make me physically stronger but emotionally it does. Sometimes our own mortality is a strong reminder of life.

8:58pm: Prompt 32 - Spring
Prompt 32

It's almost spring. How does the weather or change in seasons affect your mood?

At home the turning of the seasons was all important. We had spring later in the far north, later than it occurs in Chicago. Spring was about more than just the turning of the seasons it was a time when things got harder and easier in the environment.

When the ice melts things can get dangerous. Crossing a frozen lake or pond can turn into something deadly. Snow melting rapidly can cause torrents in rivers and crossing them is difficult as you avoid getting swept away. Dealing with these changes can be hard.

But there is more food available, for animals and therefore the human beings who rely on the land for their living. It's wonderful to see new life appearing, developing, growing. It leaves you in awe that nature can affect such a change. It makes you realise what a small part human beings are in the world.

In Chicago I don't get that same sense of scale. The change is more subtle, there are no ice caps to melt, no snow to disappear, no caribou to migrate. It's disappointing to compare spring in Chicago with that in the north. But there is a slight change. Sometimes I will walk past a tree and see new buds, the first stirring of spring. It's a reminder, and it encourages me that spring is everywhere, if only we care to look.

8:55pm: Prompt 31 - Apology
Prompt 31

What have you done that you wish you could apologize for?

I wish I had never run after that train buy I did. As a result I need to apologise to Ray. I'm not sure how though. I could make some excuses but there is no excuse for trying to run away, leave Ray. The consequences could have been very sever Ray, he could have lost everything, all through my selfish actions.

It took me some time realise that Ray forgave me very quickly. Sadly I can't forgive myself. I can;t find the right words to apologise, how can you apologise for making such a bad choice, one that would have ruined the life of your best friend?

I will try and find some way to apologise to Ray, even if it takes the rest of my life I will make it up to him. He saved my life on that train platform, it's the least I can do.

8:49pm: Prompt 30 - St Valentine
Prompt 30

St. Valentine was a Priest, martyred in 269 at Rome and was buried on the Flaminian Way. He is the Patron Saint of affianced couples, bee keepers, engaged couples, epilepsy, fainting, greetings, happy marriages, love, lovers, plague, travellers, young people. He is represented in pictures with birds and roses.

Does learning this change your thoughts about Valentine's Day?

There are many misconceptions about Valentine's day and many people don't realise that St Valentine was more than simply the patron saint of love. Although he is patron saint of many of the things we think about on valentine's day – our lover, marriage, greeting cards, he is the patron saint of much more than that.

I can't say I've really participated in Valentine's day. My first experiences of it were confused and different than the norm. One year I saw a man chase his wife covered with seal grease through the village. In the snow. I;m not actually sure that was anything to do with Valentine's day itself or simply a strange local custom.

I read about the historical figure of St Valentine in one of the books in my Grandmother's library on famous saints. Of course what many people don't realise is in fact here was more, is more than one Saint Valentine. We celebrate only one, that is the the who was buried on the Faminian way on February 14th, 269, but we know very little about his actual life.

I suppose it follows then that I know little about some of the traditions of Valentine's day. I was...embarrassed to have received so many cards form friends and family and young ladies wanting my romantic attention. Of course only one card counted, the card Ray gave me. Thanks to him I at least know the significance of St Valentine being portrayed with a rose.

7:47pm: Prompt #29 - letter to past self
Prompt #29
Write a letter to yourself at some point in the past.

Dear Benton,

Hmmm it feels writing a letter to myself. Well technically I am writing to you and you are me, although not yet. Perhaps it would be better to say I am you since I retain the memories of when I was you whereas you have no memories of being me. It’s very strange trying to puzzle that out.

I’m not sure which point I would write to. Obviously it would help if I had some reading comprehension which is a shame. I would like to write to my six year ld self and offer comfort over the death of my mother but I don’t remember much about that time and I doubt a letter from someone over thirty years later would mean much to a scared, upset, six year old.

I could always write to myself when I was at Depot to explain how my career would go, that I would graduate first in my class and go on to do some good. But again I ma not sure that would benefit me. I remember being very confident at that age.

I could perhaps write to myself before I met Victoria, warning myself against what would happen but this letter will never actually reach me in the past and so what little good it could have done can’t be realised so again there wouldn’t be much reason to.

Perhaps really I need to write to myself when I first arrive in Chicago….

I want to let you know Benton that you will survive and adapt in Chicago, in fact you will flourish. I know it seems strange considering you are not used to the big city nut you will adapt, in your won way. Perhaps most important you will have someone to help you. You will have Ray Vecchio. Ray is going to be your best friend, the best friend you have ever had. He will become more than a friend. You’ll have feelings for him that run deep. Dint; be afraid of them. Just know that whatever happens he will be there for you. Be there for him too.

Your future self,

Benton.

7:47pm: Prompt #28 - Being Liked
Prompt 28
"If your number one goal is to make sure that everyone likes and approves of you, then you risk sacrificing your uniqueness and, therefore, your excellence"

I’ve never set out to be liked. Although approval from my peers is gratifying it’s never something that I have particularly strived for and I admit it’s not something I’ve paid much attention to. I’m not sure what I would do to be liked. I know there are times when I am well like and others when I am not.

Often the latter is when I follow my own moral code and it differs from those around me. Sometimes I do feel lie I’m all alone in a certain situation. Ultimately however I can only do what I feel is right. I think it’s more important to be happier with yourself and be proud of your actions than simply to be liked.

When you are liked it is often not who you are either. People want to be liked and change things about themselves to try and fit in. I admit I’ve been tempted sometimes to do that but ultimately I’ve realised the error of my ways.

There is one person, however, who does like me despite my faults, perhaps for them and my own uniqueness. Ray. He likes me and no-one else matters. I never had to change for him or be who I wasn’t. Which is why his opinion is something I value and his approval means the world to me.

10:18pm: Prompt # 27 Look into your heart
Prompt 27
If you look into your own heart, and you find nothing wrong there, what is there to worry about? What is there to fear? – Confucius

I used to fear finding something, anything in my heart. Emotion has never been one of my strengths. Dealing with something in my heart is…difficult. It’s much easier to ignore that it exists. That way it doesn’t interfere with things, with what I’m doing. I’m not familiar with what’s in my heart; I’m not familiar with looking there. Perhaps I should. Even if I did I’m not sure I’d be a very good judge of what was wrong with it, if something was.

It’s a place that I’ve looked at so few times in my life. Matters of the heart are something that I’ve tried to ignore for many years. Of course there have been times when I’ve had to look into my heart but I’ve never been able to interpret things in the same way I imagine most people do.

I fear just looking I suppose, and I imagine perhaps that isn’t something that I should fear. I shouldn’t be afraid to look inside my own heart. I shouldn’t be afraid of what I might find. Sadly my experience hasn’t always been good. There have been times where I’ve looked into my heart and seen love when in fact it was not love but many other emotions. I’m afraid I can’t tell the difference, what is good for my heart and what isn’t.

I do know however that Ray might. I know that Ray might be able to tell me about my heart, he’s more skilled in matters of the heart than I am. Perhaps I should ask him. Yes, Ray would know. He would also show me there is nothing to fear.

10:04pm: Prompt # 26 Sell your soul for love
Prompt #26
"Any man who has the guts to sell his soul for love has the power to change the world" From Ghost Rider

Love is…an interesting emotion. It’s one that evokes strong feelings; I believe the term soul deep is often used in conjunction with the term love. I’ve even heard of the idea that some people sell their soul for love. I nearly did. Only it was only later I realised it wasn’t love.

It was love; at least I felt it was. Even in hindsight I’m not sure what it was really. I tell myself it wasn’t love. If it was love it was the kind that was soul deep. Of course it was the kind that would have destroyed myself. Perhaps if that is what selling your soul for means then that is indeed what I did. I nearly allowed my soul to be sold for what I thought was love. But the power that came out of didn’t do any good. The opposite in fact.

I don’t doubt selling one’s soul for love creates power but I would doubt if that power is good, or is bale to do good. Perhaps it depends on the sort of love, the sort of person you love. Victoria wasn’t the right person. Perhaps Ray is.

8:28pm: Prompt #24 - Snow
Prompt #24 Write a prompt based around the theme of snow.

I was very used to snow at home. I knew that snow could be dangerous; if you weren’t careful it could lead you to all kinds of danger. I found that out to my cost one winter when I fell into a converted mineshaft designed as a bear trap. The Inuit have many words to describe snow, its colour, its texture, its consistency. By knowing the precise nature of snow they know what sort is good for building, which is good for camping, which is likely to conceal danger.

Snowstorms were another danger back home. Blizzards could be long and harsh. If you were caught out in one you could suffer hypothermia or worse. Losing your bearings could be fatal; all you would be able to see is a blanket of white. There were a few times I was sent out to find some unfortunate person who had been lost and whose body we would find in a snowdrift, frozen into the exact position they had been in when they died. It was eerie.

In Chicago snow is so different. Snow isn’t treated as life or death substance but as a nuisance, an annoyance. Of course in Chicago man has ways to deal with the snow. The heat of the city means it doesn’t stay as long as it does in the north. There isn’t the same variety either. There are few different types of snow but the wind doesn’t cause it to pile up in snowdrifts in Chicago and there is a certain powdery element that seems to be missing.

Despite this snow in Chicago is a welcome reminder of home. It takes on a friendlier quality to the snow at home, I know that sounds silly but it does. It acts a reminder of home even among the buildings of Chicago. Ray calls it a visit from Canada and I appreciate that sentiment. Sometimes I could stand for hours at the window watching the snow fall, it’s hypnotic. Ray often stands with me and we watch the snow fall together. I know then that I am home. The snow is just a gentle reminder. I am reminded of walking through the snow at home, of my first meeting with Ray when the snow was crisp and sparkling in the sun. Many memories, many thoughts of home all of because of snow. I am very grateful they have snow in Chicago. I am very grateful Ray is in Chicago to watch the snow fall with me.

8:23pm: Prompt #23 Afterlife?
Prompt #23 Do you believe in an afterlife? If so, what do you expect to find when you get there?

I’d like to think that there is something beyond the current existence we have. When I was growing up I was exposed to many different beliefs and ideas about what happened after death. The local Reverend of course subscribed to the Christian belief of there being a heaven and hell. Although his preaching seemed to centre more on the morality of such films as ‘Joan of Arc’ and ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ than what would happen to our immortal souls.

Of course the beliefs of the local Inuit tribes were quite different. Their understanding of the world was not within a Christian framework but a more ancient one of spirits, animism. Everything has a spirit and it’s the shaman who is in charge of controlling and interpreting these spirits and their wishes. You have to be careful not to offend the spirits. When killing an animal you release its spirit to take revenge so the proper rituals must be performed to avoid this. There are a whole set of rituals and taboos to help do this.

I like to think that spirits do live on after death though there is no empirical proof. My father never professed a specific belief in an after-life, although the occasional presence of his ghost would suggest there is something after death. Of course I don’t know if when I’m conferring with the ghost of my dead father it’s not in my head, although others claim to have seen him, so perhaps he is real.

If that’s the most I can hope for, the chance to come back and still visit this world, then I wouldn’t be disappointed. In case my spirit doesn’t live on, however, I like to think that perhaps I will live on in the minds of the people I know. As a Mountie, part of a long tradition of honour and duty. That is the ultimate fear of men, to be forgotten but wearing this uniform that means part of me never will. That is perhaps the afterlife I shall have.

9:16pm: Prompt #22 - A Letter to my Mun
Prompt #22 Write a letter to your mun (the person that writes you). Tell them everything that's on your mind.

Dear mun, I hope I can call you mun. I’m not sure what I should call you. Perhaps I should call you Apollo since Apollo was set as the head of the muses in the Greek Pantheon but as I, unlike the muses of Greek mythology, am not female and you don’t appear to be male that would probably be inaccurate.

It’s been interesting to know you. You seem to know far more about me than I know about you. Of course than can have it’s advantages and disadvantages. But I think there are more advantages. I’m not entirely sure what they are but perhaps I’ll discover them.

I appreciate that you are writing me with the best intentions. I also realise that your portrayal of me has changed a little from how I was before. I’m not sure if I am in fact a parallel universe version of myself or how I am supposed to be. I’m not suggesting that how I am is a bad thing, not at all. I feel you write me very well, understand me.

You also write me with feelings for Ray which my other self does not appear to have, at least to some people I know that others see me, the other me, differently. I’m actually glad that me, that is the me that is writing this, that I had a chance to explore those feelings for Ray that have certainly made my experience of life, what life I have, much more interesting. In fact I can’t imagine my life without these feelings or the relationship you have created for me, the life you’ve created or me with Ray. I know it wasn’t entirely your intention so perhaps these feelings are my own. They feel as if they are.

I’d like to thank you for what you’ve done for me, and Ray.

Yours Thankfully.

Benton Fraser

12:43pm: Prompt #21 - Untold story
Prompt #21 "There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside of you." - Mayay Angelou

There are a lot of things I want to tell people but I don’t seem to be able to. It’s not that I can’t find the words, my vocabulary is excellent, it’s saying the words I find difficult. Opening up to people, telling them your deepest thoughts, fears, desires, is the hardest thing a man can do.

There are things I wanted to tell my father when he was alive, but that opportunity is lost. I can tell him those things now he’s dead but now they no longer make any difference. Telling him my memories of him and my mother no longer as the same effect. He’s not part of this world now.

I have good memories of them. I was only young when my mother died so my memories of her are not as clear as they might be. But I remember warm feelings of her and my father together, the three of us as a family, one of the few times I can recall having that feeling.

But I never told my father how much that time meant to me.

2:27pm: In a Hotel Room Somewhere [open]
Starting post for voices_rp

Benton Fraser had spent several hours studying the key and the letter in order to try and deduce their origin. He had worked out that the key was made a composite metal, possibly brass and lead though he couldn’t be sure. It was fashioned in a style he was unfamiliar with; although he could compare it to an example of an 18th century key he had once seen in a museum.

He had also spent a lot of time reading the letter, trying to see if there anything hidden within text itself but as yet he hadn’t found anything It all seemed to be pretty straightforward. The paper was of a good quality but he didn’t know who the manufacturer was, which was strange as he had a good knowledge of most of the manufacturers of north amerce and Europe . He was interrupted in his musings by his friend Detective Ray Vecchio.

“So you got one of those letters too, “ Ray said.

“Yes, Ray, and over there is a door that appears to have a lock that this key will fit."

“So, try it out,” Ray suggested.

Fraser gripped the key. “Are you sure, Ray? We have no way of knowing…”

“Just do it.”

Reluctantly Fraser placed the key in the lock and turned. The door opened. Carefully he stepped inside found himself in a rather opulent hotel room.

“Ray?”

9:47pm: Prompt #20: Lyrics
When you wake up, will you walk out?

I used to believe I was all right on my on but events in my life have led me to wonder. I seem to be…dependent when I’m in love. I rely on the other person being there. I suppose a psychiatrist would say I have abandonment issues due to the death of my mother and my father’s absence and they might be right.

I hope the person I love will always be with me but I can’t help but think one day, when I wake up the person I love won’t be there anymore. I suppose because maybe they’ll have got bored of me, maybe they won’t want to know me anymore. I wonder if I will have pushed them away.

I suppose in my present circumstances it’s a silly fear but it’s not one easily dispelled.

I know Ray will never leave.